Ivan's digestive system is beginning to crank up, but more slowly than everyone had hoped, so looks like he'll be in the hospital another couple of days. It's a week so far, feels much longer! Battling relentless hiccups, sipping broth and apple juice, reminiscing with Michael, advising his doctors on medication, Ivan's worn down--but holding up.

Day 4 was, sorry to say, rather like 2 and 3; but today things seem to have turned a corner. Ivan feels better, and has shed the most aggravating of his various tubes; he took a shower, read the papers, and plans to watch the debate (maybe a bad idea?). Tomorrow he'll begin a liquid diet. It remains for his innards to begin functioning fully again. This is taking a little longer than expected, so the ETA for his homecoming is now Friday.

He still can't talk much without hiccupping, but will have lots to say--on the sociology of hospitals for starters--once he's posting his own blogs again. Looking forward to it!

It's not unusual, it seems, for the second and third days after surgery to be harder than the first, and so it has proved for Ivan. He's been pretty uncomfortable with reflux, hiccups, and related gastric woes; an NG tube was inserted this afternoon, which should bring some relief.

But his general recovery is on track; he has no problem sitting, walks sturdily, and is healing well. He snoozes when he can, and the time will pass.

From Susan, again. Turns out the operation was not 7 hours, but almost 9. For all that, Ivan's ahead of the curve in getting up and about; spent most of the day in a chair rather than bed, takes walks around the corridors with his drips in tow (looking, Michael says, like an outsize Jack Nicholson in "Good As It Gets")--he has his father's sturdy constitution. He was in some pain for a while--skimping on the medication to avoid feeling groggy; better now. A big complaint is thirst; all he's allowed is a lollipop sponge which he dips in water and sucks. No picnic, but overall the best that could be hoped for.

Tomorrow he'll probably be moved from Parnassus to Mt. Zion, his surgeon's base; home maybe Tuesday or Wednesday, and with luck, back to being his own (much more colorful!) blogger not long after that. More anon...

This is from Susan, Ivan's sister-in-law: I've just heard from Michael that Ivan's out of surgery and the operation, though long (about 7 hours), was a success; he's in recovery and doing fine, and the biopsies showed no sign of spread.

I'll write again when there's more to tell. Cheers!

10/01-Don't worry! I'm not about to compose a piece filled with rude noises and such, (actually if I had more time, I might do JUST THAT!), but I am feeling badly for my poor rectum which will be removed this Thurs in surgery. I hope it knows that's it's demise is not at all due to any failure on its part. Infact it has served faithfully lo these 66 years,well beyond the "call of duty," and deserves only gratitude. Needless to say I will miss it!

So surgery is this Thurs. 7:30 a.m. at aUCSF Mt. Parnassus campus and I guess I'm as ready as one can be in this situation. My brother will be with me for the whole stay in the hospital (from 4-6 days) and then through recovery back down in S.C. My wonderful sister-in-law Susan Nelson, will be holding down the fort for Toby and Jade down in S.C. for the hospital stay, so I'm feeling very well-supported. Susan will try to update the blog while I'm in the hospital so you all can get some news.

I look forward to my return to S.C. and to blogging. Cheers, Ivan

9/17-21st

So in last week's installment, our hero was "saved" from an inappropriate(according to the UCSF study) chemo session at the last minute and began to wrap his head around the reality of an earlier surgery. After a sleepless night of "how come my shrinkage was less than 90% of the other study patients(always competitive, nicht wahr?), -this does not bode well?- this sucks- I'm a goner, etc. etc.," I finally came to my senses (with a little help from Drs. and nurses) that my failure to make the study cut-off figure was just THAT-no more nor less and said nothing about my prognosis. So the rest of the week was spent happily playing music with my visiting saintly brother Michael (who will be with me as long as I need him)and friends Anne Lober and George Timson.

My poor S.F. surgeon Dr. Varma, is madly scurrying around trying to find operating room privileges in the Mt. Parnassus campus of UCSF since the Mt. Zion campus where she operates is fully booked to the end of Oct. We temporarily have an Oct. 2nd date that hopefully will be confirmed Sept. 25th. That's all for now! Stay tuned! Cheers, IR

Week of 9/8-16th
Sept 11th(yes, THAT date) picked up my brother at the Oakland airport and hot-footed it over to a dim sum restaurant in Oakland for lunch with my friend Karl Goldstein. Since we didn't get there till after 2, and they were clearly winding down and stopped circulating those cute little carts on wheels at 2:30-we did not really get to give Restaurant Peony a fair test, but we managed to get enough of a taste to know that it was good and certainly deserved a return visit at an earlier time. After the carts disappeared (as we looked on with horror) I never saw my brother so aggressive in flagging down the waitress to place orders for more food (duck and bok choy), so please don't think we left hungry.

That evening we attended the Berkeley Rep's performance of the new Itamar Moses play"Yellow Jackets". As you'll remember from an earlier blog entry, Itamar is a former piano student of mine whose's making quite a name for himself in the theater world with new plays opening in San Diego, Chicago, N.Y.C. as well as this new Berkeley offering. Though not quite as polished and brilliant as "Bach in Liepzig," (in my opinion), "Yellow Jackets" was still engaging, emotional as well as funny and worthy of seeing. As Itamar (and some of the critics)say: it's need's some pruning and focussing but nonetheless incisively dissects those akward coming of age high-school years at a school filled with racial and class conflicts. Of course, it gives me great "nachas" to view Itamar's success and I look forward to more success and "nachas."

Oh yes, we were up in the Bay area because I had an ultra -sound exam at UCSF with my surgeon on Fri. morning. The exam showed that the tumor had shrunk approximately 25% after chemoradiation and that the previous lymph node involvement that was noted previously was no longer evident to Dr. Varma. Being Ivan, I had hoped for the even better news, i.e., that the tumor was totally gone and that they had actually made a great error in the first test because they now could see that the tumor was really a half-digested hamentasch that somehow had lodged itself in my behind-- but that was not to be! After getting over my disappointment, I certainly understood that 25% was not so bad - the tumor could have increased or there could have been no reduction in size,so I ended up somewhat pleased with the results and was told that I could continue with the study with surgery slated for late Oct.

So off to Davies Hall, for Michael's and my first live performance of Beethoven's 9th - and what a performance it was-- Michael Tilson Thomas making Lenny-like mvts on the podium and eliciting incisive rhythmic thrusts and exquisite solo playing from the orchestra. Though I alway knew intellectually what an important and revolutionary work it was, this live performance confirmed it for me in a very visceral and moving way.

Tues, the 16th, we arrived at the oncologists for the beginning of the first of two FOLFOX chemo treatments that was mandated by the study before surgery. I was all hooked up, waiting for the blood work reports to come back and being given pre-chemo anti-nausea drug, when Dr Wu(my oncologist) and his nurse came rushing into the room saying"Stop the infusion" My first thought was "YES!" that I had been right all along- I did not have cancer at all-the hamentachen thesis was indeed correct and that finally someone had taken the time to uncover this awful hoax- but wrong again! The new research asst. up at UCSF had mis calculated the percentage of shrinkage and thought it was 30% which was the required minimum for continuing with the study-consequently my 25% shrinkage rendered me no longer eligible for the study.Thanks to a last-minute save by the previous research asst(who has been my guardian angel)who caught the error and frantically called the S.C. Infusion Room from San Diego(where she now works) I had not yet started the heavy-duty chemo mandated by the study. A bit jarring at first, but actually neither good or bad news- just that I was no longer within the parameter of the study. I now will be having the surgery within the next 2-3 weeks at the latest, and then will have post-surgery recovery and chemo. This turn of events will cut down on the total recovery time so that i am able to get back to my old routine sooner. I like that! Cheers, IR

Week of Sept.1-7th- Late again-still "galavanting" around having a good time- this is no way for a "sick man" to act, I know ,but I don't care. So since I only have frivolous stuff to report(3 movies 3 days in a row- all excellent-Elegy, Frozen River and Transiberian Express) because I'm feeling so well and energetic, I thought I'd go back to the weeks that I was doing radiation and share with you
Inanities from the Radiation Slab-
While lying there being zapped and trying to remain motionless, I developped a radiation mantra routine. All the New Age Cancer books suggested that you "visualize" the tumor being destroyed and engulfed by the healthy cells-so I did as I sung(to myself to the tune of "Dayenu")- "Die Die Cancer-Die Die Cancer." Just in case the tumor was Jewish(God forbid!) I hoped it might appreciate a little "landsman " humor. "Farvos nit!" Cheers, IR

Posting for the weeks of Aug. 18th and 25th- Sorry about that folks. Last time I wrote I was too busy "galavanting around" to update my blog, well now, I'm so busy out and about- having a good time, that i don't even have time to check my e-mail. I know that's horrifying to those of you who check 3- 5 times a day- what can I say? e-mail is not a high priority for me- but I do want to keep the blog somewhat up-to-date so here goes:

The first round of chemoradiation ended on Aug. 15th. Though I was sorry that I wouldn't be seeing my wonderful radiation team again (that is , I hope not!) I did hand out chocolate bars as modest tokens of appreciation for their help and good cheer. Best of all it was liberating not to have to wear the 24 hour chemoinfusion pump . I really did feel "free" and that feeling persists. I can now really enjoy my showers(without the tubes and the waist pack dangling from the towel rack) enormously Had some urinary problems immediately after completing radiation that were probably due to the radiation enlarging the prostate somewhat but a visit to the urologist quickly took care of that. By the way, the urologist was an attractive woman in high heels and lots of make-up. An interesting choice of specialty for a women, methinks. I asked her (with a wink) "why urology? " and she replied "I just like it." Clearly a woman who knows what's good! I'll be seeing her again in a few weeks and maybe even ask her more lewd questions. Remember my leitmotif for this illness is to have as much fun with it as I can- what I now refer to as my "cancer chutzpah."

If I told you how many movies and plays I've seen in the last two weeks you wouldn't believe me. Even loved the recent film of "Momma Mia" with Meryl Streep camping it up shamelessly and clearly having great fun. Maybe the radiation treatments weakened my critical faculties somewhat, but on the other hand- they might have loosened me up somewhat so that I could really appreciate a good piece of "camp." Even saw and enjoyed "Vicky Christina Barcelona" film after giving up on Woody Allen movies a few years back. Yes, it must be the radiation! "Man on the Wire" was excellent in all regards (movie-making and subject)

Life continues busy and pleasant. My capacity for socializing -clearly expanded. Many pleasant dinners, lunches, snacks with friends- all warm and nurturing.

Toby started a job this weekend and so far so good. Jade started third grade at her new school. An excellent teacher who is a professional ceramicist so they'll be plenty of interesting art projects for Jade. We bike ride every morning to school (5 minutes away) and Jade hurries to get ahead so she won't be seen with her Grandpa in tow. She's so adolescent at 8, it's scary.

I've given you an extra long blog installment to do penance for my tardiness- so I'll now close with -if you told me how well I now feel, how energetic -how relaxed I've become dealing with cancer, I'd say you're crazy- not possible. But there it is !